Burnout Hits Different: When You’re Neurodivergent and Exhausted from Just Existing
I didn’t know I was burnt out until I realized I wasn’t recovering. I used to think I was just tired or overwhelmed. That a good night’s sleep, or a weekend off, would eventually fix things. But when you’re neurodivergent—when your brain is wired to constantly filter, interpret, and mask—burnout doesn’t just show up after a stressful day. It builds like a quiet storm. And suddenly you’re drowning in it.
Whether you’re autistic, have ADHD, or both (hello, me), burnout is more than stress—it’s a full-system shutdown. It’s when the demands of life finally outweigh your internal resources for too long. You might be eating, sleeping, even functioning in public, but inside, you're running on fumes.
What Burnout Feels Like When You’re Neurodivergent
For me, ADHD burnout often looks like this:
My brain won't start, but also won’t shut up.
Everything feels urgent and impossible at the same time.
I stare at tasks for hours, doing nothing—but feeling awful the entire time.
Social interaction feels painful. Even texting back feels like too much.
My internal monologue turns cruel. “Why can’t you just do it?”
Autistic burnout, on the other hand, has its own flavor. There’s often a deep sensory fatigue—the kind that makes even soft noises feel like sandpaper on your skin. I retreat, isolate, and lose my words. Literally. Verbal communication becomes difficult. Executive function tanks. Routines fall apart. The desire to "just be left alone" becomes overwhelming.
In both cases, the common thread is exhaustion beyond sleep. As described by Higgins et al. (2021), autistic burnout is “a state of pervasive exhaustion, loss of function, and reduced tolerance to stimulus” caused by cumulative life stress, particularly the stress of masking and unmet needs.¹ Sound familiar?
You’re Not Lazy. You’re Tired—For a Reason.
One of the worst things about neurodivergent burnout is the shame. Because we often look “fine” on the outside, people don’t see the internal collapse. We’re taught to push through, to perform, to keep up with the world that’s not built for us. When we can’t, we blame ourselves. But this isn't a failure—it's a signal.
Burnout in ADHDers is linked to years of emotional dysregulation, chronic overwhelm, and never feeling caught up. According to Katerina Maniadaki and colleagues (2018), adults with ADHD report significantly higher levels of emotional exhaustion and depersonalization.² In other words, we detach and go numb, because we’ve been overstimulated for too long.
And autistic folks? Many report that burnout begins early in life. Especially for late-diagnosed individuals who spent years trying to pass as neurotypical—masking their stims, forcing eye contact, pretending social cues make sense. It’s no wonder that burnout becomes cyclical.
So What Helps?
Recovery doesn’t happen overnight. But here’s what I’ve learned, and what I now offer to my clients at Artist Eye Counseling.
Radically reduce demands.
Not “prioritize better.” I mean actually cut out what’s not essential. That might mean pausing social obligations, taking a leave, or canceling everything for a week. It’s not selfish—it’s survival.
Lower the bar.
Microwaving a burrito? Success. Brushing your teeth today? Amazing. Stop grading yourself by productivity. Healing begins when we shift the focus from achievement to care.
Lean into stimming and sensory regulation.
This is crucial for autistic burnout, but helpful for ADHDers too. Weighted blankets, quiet spaces, fidget tools, baths, body doubling. Whatever helps your nervous system reset—do more of that.
Identify safe people.
Burnout is isolating. You need one or two people who understand—who won't push or fix, but will just be with you in it. Whether it’s a therapist, a friend, or a support group, connection is medicine.
Stop masking where you can.
This one’s hard. But if part of your day involves pretending to be someone you’re not, it’s eating your energy. Even small changes—like wearing your noise-canceling headphones or saying “no” without explanation—can start to unmask your life.
You’re Not Broken
If you're reading this and nodding along, you’re not alone. Burnout isn’t weakness—it’s a signal that you’ve been strong for too long. The world often asks neurodivergent people to adapt constantly. But at some point, we have to stop bending and start building environments where we actually fit.
Burnout recovery is about honoring your limits, not pushing past them. It’s about rest, yes—but also about reshaping your life in ways that don’t burn you out in the first place.
You're not failing. You're human. And your nervous system deserves rest.
Sources:
Higgins, J. M., Arnold, S. R. C., & Pellicano, E. (2021). "Autistic burnout: An identity‐based model of burnout in autistic adults." Autism in Adulthood.
Maniadaki, K., et al. (2018). "Burnout and job stress in adult ADHD: The role of emotional dysregulation and organizational support." Journal of Attention Disorders.